"..don't be scared.."

Stop hiding your tears,

Stop hiding you pains,

I know it's a fake smile ,

right there on your face..

Trust me I care,

Trust me and just share,

What I all need is

A shining crescent moon on your face..

Your eyes just can't lie,

Your words just betray you,

C'mmon I know you better than

anyone else in the world..

You gotta tell me ,

Whats wrong?

It's there in your heart,

so what if we are apart?

C'mmon just hold my hand,

and hug me tight,

Don't be scared ,

'Cause I know it's right!

I love to see that smile,
I love to see you giggle all night,
You are the most wonderful dream,
let your pains out and just scream...

Walk away if you want,

But don't forget I am still standing there,

'Cause I know you are gonna come back,

don't be scared those feelings are nothing but taunts!!

"..loneliness and me.."

Cursing my fate,

'cause I always hurt you,

Pardon me pease,

I never meant to do so..

Rejoices my soul,

but still  it's sad somewhere,

where the low light shatters,
darkness matters!

I Just cry all alone,
and Scream till pains are gone..
pearl like tears,
rolling down my cheeks..

No stars in the sky,
Just a pale white moon,
Yes I know I'll die soon,
don't have to shed tears now..

Hollowness in my life,
and emptiness in my heart,
dreams don't come true,
if it does it would be only you..

The choppy sea,
and the pleasing breeze,
The bitter sweet lonliness ,
and the weary darkness!

I am worthless or naive?
seems like i am in dark caves!
begging you to hold my hand,
'cause i am scared..

Till the time I am alive,
be with me, my soul,
Don't you want to be here?
Or you are just don't
wanna show that you care?

Birthday Blast!!

haha! hey Alan ^-^ awww.... man you are 17 now!! You know you are so awesome...haha! you are just like me actually.. its more than  2 months lol but still.. we make smileys and hugs.. I know we have actually started talking now.. You know me more than anyone else.. you may feel weird but yeah.. its true.. I have told you something that no one knows.. Our lives are quiet similar..
Waaaaaahhhaaa.. that day you  and Mark really scared me.. <.< haha! its okay.. lol

Oh well you are crazy!! o.o I really want to see you eating.. haha! that would be so much fun (fast metabolism) lol You are a nice cook..though I you never made me anything <.< haha! Sexy man!! lmao... Oh well your bun bun now doesnt know what else to say :P

I'll miss you Koonook.. you are really sweet.. thanx for being nice with me :) Don't drink too much Coca Cola.. it's bad for you.. coz you always feel sick.. take your medicines in time.. don't expect me to do the same 'cause I wont haha!

Once again a very Happy Birthday Koonook ^-^ By the way.. If I ever get a chance to meet you then I would run to you and mess up your hair..wahahahaha.. so what if I am short.. I can still reach to your hair remember?

*Bun Bun gives you Chocolate cake and Coca Cola cans* o.o

Chocolate Cake and strawberries over it o.o

Coco Cola Cans

enjoy!! ^-^

I just hope that this 17th year of your life brings more happiness.. Keep smiling.. don't forget me.. I will come back after 10 months :P and yeah.. your Bun Bun does not know how to make such lines.. just be happy.. don't cry and yeah.. keep listening to that song! ^-^

*hugs tight*

love ya my bestie

I just hope you like this surprise.. aaahh.. I really didn't know what to do so..I did this.. I use this blog to express what I feel and you know it right?

*pokes you and messess up your hair* :D

"..If I were.."

Hahaha.. so finally I am doing a tag now.. it has been ages since I last did any tag.. so here I come.. wheeeeee.. I have been tagged by many ppl but I really dont remember.. If you have tagged me earlier then just remind me about that!! :D

Oh well I have been tagged by Kelvin this time.... one of the aweome-st blogger buddy in blog land :D

If I were  a month.. I would be November 'cause..I was born in November.. :P

It I were a day.. I would be Friendship day! (don't want any enemies! >_<) o.o

If I were a time of the day..I would 2 am.. I love the bitter sweet silence and darkness (though I am scared of both!!)

If I were a season.. I would be Spring..'cause I feel like I've got wings but I can't fly cause my wings are broken!! o.o

If I were a planet.. I would venus...'cause its brightest one.. I want to shine haha! ^-^

If I were a direction.. I would be straight..I can't remember roads that goes zig-zag and all!! >.>

If I were a drink..I would be something..which is so pure !! o.o

If I were a tree.. I would be chocolate tree.. I know that does not exist but it would be so much fun to be so.. haha! and wont let anyone to eat my chocolates!! xP

If I were a animal..I would be a bunny...awwww.. they are so cute! o.o (aaah...but my friends already call me machli i.e fish) <.<

If I were an instrument.. I would be a Guitar..hehe! I like guitars! ^-^

If I were a fruit.. I would be Strawberry or a Mango.. yummy! o.o

If I were a food.. aaahh.. I would be a Chocolate...wahahahaha (would you consider it food?) o.O

If I were a celebrity..I would be someone not only talented but a sweet and pure hearted! (everyone is so mean! <.<)^-^

If I were a colour.. I would be Blue.. its pure and true! o.o

If I were a book.. I would be a love story..so much love..so much care..sometimes its a fiction but it makes me giggle and yeah..sometimes it makes me cry! v.v

If I were a song.. I would like to be all those songs that my besties suggested me(the songs on my blog).. or else something that could make anyone smile and could stop their tears.. ^-^

If I were a movie..I would be any romantic one...hey dont look me like that!.. *hides his pic under the pillow* >.>

If I were a flower.. I would be something which is so delicate.. and so beautiful(I know all flowers are delicate but wanna be the most delicate) xD

If I were a facial expression.. I would be a smile that can brighten up anyone's day!  *blush blush* xP

If I were to tag someone.. it would be you.. yes.. you all 99 people right there..and if anyone join this site.. they can have this tag too !! :P

P.S. If you are following this blog..and I haven't yet returned the favour then plz  tell me about it.. I have become so forgetful this days! >.> haha! love ya! ^-^

Choco's blah blah..!

It's better to wear a fake smile than to wear a fake heart;

'Cause a fake smile can bright up someone's life but

A fake heart can shatter someone in parts...

Surprise!!

Hahaha..guess what's the day? I know that you know its 23rd May..but its special.. you know why? Oh well 'cause today is my friend's birthday.. no not just one friend but actually two haha!

Today is my blogger friend..haha! 21 old kid..Shravan and my Vampire bestie Xin yi's birthday... Happy birthday to you both x))

Let me tell you both.. you are getting OLD guys!! hahaha.. (just kidding) :P

Shravan Happy 21st birthday :D you have really been one of my inspiration in blogosphere.. :)) So now you are no more a 20 year old kid..but a 21 year old kid huh! :))

Xin yi.. seriously..you are like my elder sis :)) Happy 19th birthday to you.. love you a lot.. you really mean a lot..Sorry i hurt you 2 days before your birthday..I promise wont do it again.. :))

Ummm.. haha! wanted to make this day special for you.. so yea.. just wrote here..Sorry If you don't like it o_O but yea.. I was so confused..and I really really wanted to do something..hope you both like it..

Love ya..

May you both get all the happiness of the world..

(sorry I dont know how to make such lines!! O_o)

aaaah.. just want you both to be happy!! xD

"..I am sorry.."

I felt you hate me, it was lame;

I am regretting now;

Why did I let the hatred flame?

I gotta fix it some how.

I broke your heart;

gave you pain;

May be it was destiny's part;

but then what did I gain?

Life's so unpredictable;

Sometimes a game;

Sometimes so loveable;

I did it for no stardom or fame;

You may not believe;

but I had a nightmare;

it was like you  decieve;

and you dont care..

I promise I would never do it again;

Talk to me I am feeling lame;

I am a fool and an insane;
You know I am not the same;

Try listening to my heart;
Its crying;
Are we so apart?
you couldn't even see I am dying..

P.S. Mark.. Xin yi I am so sorry.. I really didn't want to hurt you both... you guys know me right.. I easily feel lonely..the thing I wrote above..wasn't a poem..none of the rhyming stuffs here are poems.. they are my feelings.. I write what I feel.. I am regretting now...plz dont do this to me.. It was just a missunderstanding.. you both really dont know but I have been crying these past days just for you guys.. you really dont have any clue that with what I have been through..
I can't live without my Vampire besties

"..no matter.."

No matter who you are,

No matter what you are,

No matter where you belong

I just know one thing..

you're on mind..

and on my soul..

You are one bright star in the sky,

giggling there so high

my only campanion in lonliness

I just love this weird bitter sweetness

A smile, a sigh and everything here..

No matter what I am feeling;

No matter why ain't this healing..

No matter why ain't I dreaming..

you are just like those footprints

left on the sand;

which might disappear at the end..

secrets, confessions and everything in hand..

No matter if you lie;

No matter if I cry;

No matter if I die;

Just like a lightening bug,

You just guide my way in the dark;

Wishes, dreams and everything sparks..

now I just know that

The silence isn't so bad,

No matter if I feel sad,

No matter if you didn't see that,

One thousand lies in eyes..

yes in my eyes.. looking so bright,

No matter if my soul cries,

No matter..yeah.. no matter

if my dream just dies!

hmmm.. okay so I guess this is 150th post =] What does that mean? o_O You'll find more emo posts here! wahahahaha! be ready for that..and yeah.. forget about my previous post =]

Kelvin, Wisewit, Sulagna di and Madhu..thank you so much..for caring..love yall xD Just want to hug you guys :))

I am really feeling better now ^-^ thanks for being here with me! you guys are awesome!

OuT bUrsT!!

sorry i have deleted everything in this post.. coz what i felt for them was lame.. I dont want anyone to read it now so :/ just removed it.. it was just a misunderstanding and nothing else.. I misunderstood my friends and i am regreting now..

"..was found guilty.."

Adored freedom but,

still trapped somewhere,

I was found guilty to care;

I was found guilty to share..

The smile on my face was him;

Even in dark the light never seemed dim;

I was a fool and still am.

I was found guilty to trust;

I was found guilty which was a must..

I was scared to get closer;

'cause nothing lasted with me forever!

A bitter sweet loneliness was better;

I was found guilty to befriend him;

I was found guilty to scream..

I stayed awake when I was supposed to be asleep,

These feelings are still strong and deep,

My soul forgot to weep;

I was found guilty to daydream;

I was found guilty to be under moonbeam..

Want him to be happy,

Wished that he never feel lonely,

Cried for him bitterly..

I was found guilty to think we are peers;

I was found guilty to shed tears..

Felt so warm and cozy,

Whenever he hugged me;

I fell in illusion and was giggly,

I was found guilty to be in love..

I was found guilty to consider it love..

"..A cocooned princess.."

She wasn't beautifull,

she wasn't tall,

she wasn't graceful,

but she had a beautiful heart..

Who she was?

She was.. a cocooned princess..

She was a normal girl,

yet she was so special,

she had dreams,

but those were shattered..

She never lived in huge castles,

She never had maids and warriors,

She didn't wear any crown

or lovely robes..

She lived in a virtual world,

with a fake smile on her face,

She never raised voice;

for the injustice done to her,

and that was her crime..

Butterflies never danced;

nor the birds sang,

But the li'l angels giggled,

and the stars twinkled..

whenver she passed by..

Who she was?

She was just a cocooned princess...

She was Naive;

She was shy,

She was betrayed,

she was alone,

She was scared and broken..

She had a friend whom she loved,

But one day they left her,

no, they didn't betrayed

they passed away..

No one to care,

No one in despair,

She wished to fly,

but was scared of falling..

She was free yet she was cocooned..

She was missunderstood,

She was a poor soul,

who lived all alone..

She was a cocooned princess...

"..says a shattered soul.."

My dreams ain't mine now,

My life ain't mine now..

Instead of love and care,

they gave me pain and tears..

They rule my life,

They ruined my life..

so many things to be shared;

but me, me is scared!

Doesn't have any clue;

where my soul shatters..

Darkness is scary;

and silence so weary;

eyes glitters, star twinkles;

and the moon giggles..

"Scared of being alone"

my heart cries.

fake comrades can never know;

my heart is empty and hollow..

Just need someone who care;

someone who have

these same feelings to share..

someone who can understand;

and hold my hand;

so that i would never feel alone again..

"..alone yet not so alone.."

dreams and nightmares,

are all same here..
Tears and smiles,
forever near..
A confused soul,
and an impregnible heart..
Truth and lie,
and a deep sigh..
regrettings no more,
let this love galore..
Don't hide your pains,
let the fireflies guide your way..
the wind whispers,
"leave this despair and lets share,
these feelings inside you ain't just yours..
..Now you are not alone anymore.."

"..from my heart.."

mmmm.. :| okay.. you all might be thinking why I want to delete all my accounts! Actually I scored really low in my exams..which was unexpected.. My parents are angry.. My dad was really angry..he didn't talk to me for 2 days..and then My mom and dad thinks that it's all because of blogging and chatting! >.< But I started chatting just a month before after my exams.. And when I have friends to interact with.. I can't.. well I have just few days..till june 16 but I hope that dad drops his idea! >.<

 So I'm just deleting all my accounts.. coz if he stays firm with his idea... I won't be able to come online for 10 months! yea.. you read it right its 10 MONTHS!!! Ummm.. I'll miss you guys :] I'll miss Mark and Xin yi ( my two vampire friends) I'll miss Alan..though we talk less and just make smileys but still I'll miss him! I'll miss Aditya and Adarsh... haha! well these are my friends on myyearbook :|

Aditya says I'm naive(true), Xin yi thinks I'm funny (I wonder how?), Adarsh says I'm stupid and stubborn (agreed) Alan..mmm.. he never says anything..we both are shy so we never talk(except sometimes) haha! we both stay online for hours and just make smileys and hugs! and Mark...he is so awesome.. I dont know but I cried for him. Adarsh says I can't stay without talking to him!! and I love him!!! (but I dont believe in love and relationships 'cause I've never been in it) But don't you think I am too young to fall in love.. this feelings are annoying me.

Xin yi caught me today..now she knows that the guy with whom may be I'm in love is Mark!! mmm.. that's really weird..why do I care so much about him? Why did I burst into tears when she told me that he would be gone for a week! Xin yi says I overcare about him :? I dont want Mark to know this..He is my bestie!! Don't want to lose such a nice friend :| But what if Xin yi tells this to Mark! :? Mark lives in Croatia and he is 15 !! How can I think about love! :?

Ummmm..well anyways I'll miss him and everyone...If dad stands firm with his idea..then I would tell this to Mark! (But still I dont want to believe that its love..I am just possesive about my friends) They all know that I would delete my accounts except Adarsh! He isn't online these days! :?

PS I won't delete my blog! :]

PPS so Is there anyone who can help me out with this feelings? coz this feelings really sucks! and its not love right? I am too young for this love and even Mark is younger than me!

PPPS Just pray that My dad drops his idea atleat for me and I can't leave without you all! o.o

Tons of awards! :D

haha! I've been awarded with so many awards and here it is :

from jingle :D

Golden heart blogger award :D

Love is precious award :]

Rocking girl blogger award! :D

Best friends forever award :]

most influential blogger award :]

most supportive blogger :]

From cheryl

The circle of freinds award

and Rules:

*Post 5 things you love to do*

*Pass on to 10 Bloggers*

Hmmm.. okay so here I go:

1. I love to eat chocolates! :D

2. I love blogging though I am not blogging these days! >.<

3. I love to sleep! :P

4. I love making smileys..haha i am addicted to it..lol.. I over use this smileys :P

5. I love hanging out with friends..but most important.. I love to chat with Mark and Xin yi(two vampires in my life) ! ^___^

and it goes to:

Koo

Nipun

Rishi

Shravan

Adreamygal

Dudo

Wisewit

Nitwit

Sankoo baba

Madhu

From dudo:

Rules:

*In order to accept the award, please post it on your blog with the name of the person who awarded it, including the link to their blog.*

*Pass the award onto 5-10 of your most loyal followers.*

*Remember to contact those followers and let them know they have been chosen for this award.*

So the award goes to:

Ayu

Vittaldas Prabhu

Suruchi

Divya

Riya

Cheryl

Jingle

Ambiguous angel

Suryagni

That's all sorry about the link! enjoy guys.. haha! I love you xD