Friday, April 25, 2014

The page still remains blank

Trying to pen down the emotions,
but failing so undeniably.
Starting by capturing one thought,
and sugar coating it with ornamental words.

The page still remains blank.
The head still remains busy fighting, 
the unwanted thoughts.
Eyes get heavier and turn down,
the proposal to compose something beautiful.

Managed to scribble something like a line, 
which fall short to mean anything.
The words are scattered everywhere,
and I can't frame it together. 

The page still remains blank.
Words are sore from being used,
over and over again.
They have switched sides,
and have refused to divulge,
the premonition and apprehension.

After two hours, ten minutes, 
and twelve seconds later,
The page still remains blank.
Seems like it's time to give up the battle.

It's time to put down the pen,
and get up from the chair.
It's time to turn down the lights,
and lie on the cold matres.
It's time to close eyes and, 
let the dreams fill the void.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

State of mind.

Detaching   while   seeking   attachment,
Smiling   while   hiding  the     sadness,
Suffocating while gulping down the pain,
Fidgeting while trying to move forward,
And carry on with life without any companion.

Another night with worthless thoughts.
Another lie     coated   with bitter truth.
Another insomniac with horrifying past and unpleasant present.
Another   page   of      unwritten  words,
Stating   the   state   of   mind.

Things   are   not   exactly   okay,
Even   though   they   look   like it.
Morbid fascination with self destruction,
Never     helped    the    undying,
Nauseous     feeling.

Friday, April 11, 2014

Anxiety

It's one of those nights 
where it all crumbles 
down to the ground. 

It starts from 
one corner of the mind 
and slowly makes it way 
to the heart.
It rumbles in the stomach 
and finally reaches
 to the tip of my toes. 

The anxiety mixes 
with the blood 
and runs in the veins. 

I feel cold 
in 35 degrees.
I feel filthy 
in my own skin

I can't help but think 
of all the wrongs 
I've done. 
I can't get up but 
lie like a corpse
in the pile of my own 
failures. 

I can't make it go away.
Is it okay to feel this way?
What's wrong with me?
Why is it all that I see?

Monday, April 7, 2014

Left like nothing ever existed

You told me that 
you'd help,
but you walked away.
You told me that 
you cared,
but you didn't even 
look my way.
You told me that 
you'd be there,
But you weren't.
You told me that 
you'd be a friend,
but abandoned.
You told me that 
you'd never leave
but you did.
You told me that 
you weren't the same
but you were.
You did everything 
that you told me,
you wouldn't do.
And you were everything 
that you told me,
you were not.


You lied,
You stole my secrets.
You made me believe 
That you were different
And left 
Like nothing 
Ever existed.

Friday, April 4, 2014

Love.



I  wonder  how                    it feels to love 
someone     and   to  be          loved by   them   back. 
I wonder how you can  love    someone so much that you
can't  imagine a second without  them. I wonder how love can 
make  someone  to give up  everything   for  that one person.
I wonder how  love can  make  this world a  beautiful place 
to    live. I   wonder how   just one   person  can make you 
feel    so wonderful       and   complete  when   you are 
with    them.   I   wonder         how  lovers  feel.  I 
wonder    if     I'd    able  to    love  someone
enough    to   feel    all  of      those 
things. I  wonder  if    I'll ever 
meet someone who will
  love  me that much 
and more.
-S.M.