Saturday, May 24, 2014

A voice is screaming in her head,
Struggling to break free, 
and get lost in the air.

It's once again, 
hard to figure out,
whether it's pain or fear.

Eyes are tired, 
of holding back the tears,
that've been trapped, 
with all the unhealthy emotions.

Overwhelmed by her own feelings,
She wishes to escape to a place,
and feel numb again.

Digging her nails,
into her own skin,
She's hoping for the physical pain, 
to overcome the emotional pain.

It's starting to get bad again,
She's falling into the darkest hole,
that's been created in her own head.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Untitled

I hope the unhealthy thoughts die, 
as soon as I type them on this paper. 
I'm really sorry, 
but I'm tempted to harm myself again tonight, 
for the things I failed to accomplish.
And I know you are going to stop me,
and tell me I'm perfect ,
but I know it's not true.
The truth is that I'm not okay. 
The truth is that I'm pretty damaged. 
The truth is that I'm easily replaceable, 
and I hate being so. 
When I raise my hand, 
they try to reach for the blades instead of pens. 
They try to paint my arms red with the razor,
when I try to pour myself out on a paper.
Being aware of all the beautiful things in the world,
I'd never choose myself over someone who is better.
But I want you to choose me.
I know that's insane,
but I really want you to choose me.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Not enough.

She is that wounded person,
who has been trying, 
to protect and fix, 
everything for everyone;
because she knows,
how it feels when everything,
falls apart.
But that's not enough.

She is being their warm, 
and safe duvet trying ,
to put everyone back to sleep; 
keeping them from, 
screaming in horror,
while the monsters of the night,
fill the room with,
chilled daunting aura.
But that's not enough.

She holds their hand when,
they decide to start all over again. 
But that's not enough. 

She has been taking, 
their cuts and scratches, 
and sucking up the poison, 
but that's not enough. 
Nothing she does is enough. 

Someone make her stop.
Life is too short to live for, 
someone who doesn't care.
She is running out strength. 
She is running out of hope.
She is running out of love. 
She is running out of air.
She can't do it anymore,
Someone do her a favor,
Give her back her smile,
and bring her back to her life.

Friday, May 2, 2014

I want to forget you.
Erase and white wash,
the darkest corner of my mind,
where you hide.

I want to stop,
writing verses that
follow the traces of
your existence.

I want the scars,
on my arms to fade soon,
so "our good times and bad times"
stop replaying itself,
over and over again.

I want to burn down,
the feelings I had for you,
when I was too foolish,
to think that you cared.