"..three and me.."

Wheeee.. heyaa.. yes I am still alive.. haha! so here I am with "three and me" tag! This time I've been tagged by Leo.. xD

My 3 famous name~

choco

bun bun

lovely

3 thing that scares me~

Loosing my friends

Being alone

fall in love! o.O

3 thing which makes me smile~

Alan's random stuffs!

webcamming with Mark!

Owl city! ^_^

3 things I love~

chocolates

friends

blogging! o.o

3 things I hate~

backstabbing

being mean

wars!!

3 things I dont understand~

so called friendship!

why I can't be mean? o.O

my family!! :O

3 things I am doing right now~

thinking about my so called best friends! :|

waiting for Mark to come online!

waiting for Alan's reply! o.O

3 thing I can't do~

to take revenge

stop crying for silly stuffs!

to commit suicide! o.O

3 things I think you should listen to~

Owl city :)

ummm me? o.O

and offcourse your heart!! (*pokes you*)

3 things I watched as kid(I'm still a kid right?)~

High school Musical

Shinchan! o.o

other disney channel stuffs!!

3 things I want in relationship~

dont have any idea!! XD

Love?

care :))

3 things that appeal to me from opposite sex~

Eyes! o.o

smile! XD

pure heart?

3 favourite fictious characters~

Harry potter

Ron weasley

Mr. tumnus! ^_^

3 of my hobbies~

writting

reading

drawing!

3 drinks I drink regularly~

water

Milk (I'm a good girl)

ummm.. orange juice! o.o

3 things I like about myself~

can't be mean! =/

loves friends!

being a kiddo!

3 things I hate about myself~

my height! :|

to trust anyone

being naive! o.o

3 things I'm wearing right now~

spectacles!

pyajama

smile :))

2 truths and a lie (orderly)~

don't know anything about poetry~

I just write my feelings! o.o

I cried today! xP

3 blog buddies I wanna tag~

Sunakshi di

Nipun

Cheryl

"..Just once.."

I want to be an eight year old kiddo again!

I want to sing and dance like an insane..

I want to hug someone right now;

I want to let my tears flow..

I want to be an endear,

I want to disappear;

I want to escape this place,

I want to have a delightful grace;

I want to be alone,

I want to say that my fears are gone;

I want be a muse;

I want to feel the giggling views;

I want to walk alone in lonely streets;

I want to hear my heart beats;

I want to rejoice every moment;

I want to forget the torment;

I want to know if they really care;

I want to know if I really matter;

I want to get stoned;

I want to fall in illusion;

I want to party whole night with my friends,
I want to forget that happy moments soon ends..

I want to fly to the sky,

I want to cry and die,

yes I just want to smile,

from the bottom of my heart;

I don't want that smile to fade,

even if I am dead..

P.S so damn random but yeah from the heart.. feeling sad.. want to meet Alan, Mark, Xin yi and Poxy.. want to hug them tight.. Right now feeling like to die..would be fine I guess.. Crying alot since yesterday.. want to be alone for once.. a thought popped in my mind.. what if I die.. and no one knows about the reason... want someone to regret for what they did!! ummmm.. lame? =/ haha! *hugs tight* byeee :)

"..If I could.."

I wish if I could borrow your pains;

I wish if I could be your reason to smile;

I don't believe in God anymore!

If he really exists then why

is mine and yours heart so sore?

I don't want it to happen to you

that had happened to me..

you know?

My life is miserable and

is gonna be same till the end

It's worse than nightmare..

I'm stuck but life's still movin'

folks keep hurting and murdering

my naive and sensitive soul

Birds keeps on chirping and

rain keeps on falling..

I follow unknown fears;

and try to hold back my tears..

I walk like a muse in dark lonely street;

I am lost in your memories;

with a dark hope to reach the,

valley of death and ocean of stress;

and finally to the end of my life..

but before that.. I would like, to

bring back joys in your life;

I wish if I could kiss away your tears,

I wish if I could die with your fears..

"..stay alone?.."

Dreams and illusions;

darkness and silence..

doesn't need any companions;

they hurt her more

than the lonliness..

Her misty eyes and

crescent smile faints;

When the stars giggles and

the pink breeze cuddles her in pain..

Why tears doesn't stop?
Why happy movement doesn't stay?
She cried alot to lesser her pain;
Just want to yell out her feelings again..

She wanna tell them
"stop being mean to her!"
-they've never seen her love and care;
but just for her one mistake
they've become so unfare..

Ever thought of her fragile
and naive heart?
Ever heard to the faint echoes
that says don't wanna stay apart?

May be not and that's why
they're gonna leave her alone;
Yes she's scared..
but she doesn't wanna tell them that!

They haven't listened
to her mumbling voice;
and haven't seen her
glittering eyes..
Yes it was the time
when she was crying..

But they never noticed
Oh Jesus, what a fate..!
Now it's too late;
She's not gonna turn back..

She never cared to check her bruises
those blood stains were visible,
but she never noticed...
They are the one who has
who ruled her heart
and torn it in two parts..

"..alone again.."

Dreams got ruined and

Hopes of being together

 shattered forever?

I stared the bright

white moon last night

and got misty eyes

full of lies..

Ache in my heart

yells why are we apart?

I cried a silent tear

with a fear of loosing you..

Dew drops on the leaves

giggled silently..

It reminded me of your eye

which made me to die..

Then a thought popped

in my mind..

Will you cry if I die?

I looked up at sky

and had a deep sigh..

My tears just don't stop

I want to be with you..

I promise not to

abandon this hope..

I tried to hide myself,

from the the eyes of the world..

I stood behind the pole,

and cried a silent tear..

The stars and the moon

are just so alone;

yeah.. as alone as me..

I wish if they were near;

I wish if you were here..

"..I'll stay away.."

I'll stay away..

scared to hurt them..

I can cry alone,

won't let them to know even that..

Smiles heals my pains,
but my heart is sore now,
 I Swear I never played with them
but I'll stay away..

It seems like nightmare,
but a dream to see them happy again..
I'll stay away;
alone in my despair...

 

Just a tight hug

for the last time and

I'll be gone forever and

would never come again..

 

I'll stay away..

dont wanna hurt them,

I have to now keep my distance..

I know they're not gonna understand..

 

but have to move 'cause

dont wanna be that foolish girl I was

and end up worse again;

I'll cry all alone..

I'll be keeping away..

I am trying not to want to hurt them;

trying to bring the smile again..

One last thing I need to do now..

....is just to stay away..

P.S. Inspired by "Last thing"

PPS. I'll miss them(Mark, Alan, Poxy and Xin yi) .. and really want them to be happy.. Mark has deleted his MYB and FB account.. i am gonna do the same.. not because he did..because

 I wont be online for 10 months!

PPPS. I'll miss you too :))

Choco's blah blah..!!

Don't expect anything from anyone..

and you'll get everything from everyone!!

"..Random.."

As I walk along the sea shores,

Smiles the infinite blue,

Whispers the pink mist,

Stares the dead dryness,

Lonliness scaterred everywhere..

Its just me and my thoughts,

A shattered soul and an

impregnible heart..

The beauty is in soul,

and in your heart..

I have never loved you,

I have always loved ,

the almighty who lies ,

within you..

I am broken and dejected,

but the stars still twinkle at me,

And the shooting stars,
still grants me wish..

I stand alone with lonliness;
and secrets in my heart
are no more apart
from your heart..

P.S. sorry I am not updating my blog and not even checking yours blog! :( eeeehh it's writer's block I guess! X(

 I want to spend more time with Mark, Alan, Xin Yi and Poxy.. they are my friends for life.. My school's gonna start -.-" from 16 june.. wont come online for 10 months then.. I may shedule some posts! I dont know! >.<