"..no matter.."

No matter who you are,

No matter what you are,

No matter where you belong

I just know one thing..

you're on mind..

and on my soul..

You are one bright star in the sky,

giggling there so high

my only campanion in lonliness

I just love this weird bitter sweetness

A smile, a sigh and everything here..

No matter what I am feeling;

No matter why ain't this healing..

No matter why ain't I dreaming..

you are just like those footprints

left on the sand;

which might disappear at the end..

secrets, confessions and everything in hand..

No matter if you lie;

No matter if I cry;

No matter if I die;

Just like a lightening bug,

You just guide my way in the dark;

Wishes, dreams and everything sparks..

now I just know that

The silence isn't so bad,

No matter if I feel sad,

No matter if you didn't see that,

One thousand lies in eyes..

yes in my eyes.. looking so bright,

No matter if my soul cries,

No matter..yeah.. no matter

if my dream just dies!

hmmm.. okay so I guess this is 150th post =] What does that mean? o_O You'll find more emo posts here! wahahahaha! be ready for that..and yeah.. forget about my previous post =]

Kelvin, Wisewit, Sulagna di and Madhu..thank you so much..for caring..love yall xD Just want to hug you guys :))

I am really feeling better now ^-^ thanks for being here with me! you guys are awesome!

OuT bUrsT!!

sorry i have deleted everything in this post.. coz what i felt for them was lame.. I dont want anyone to read it now so :/ just removed it.. it was just a misunderstanding and nothing else.. I misunderstood my friends and i am regreting now..

"..was found guilty.."

Adored freedom but,

still trapped somewhere,

I was found guilty to care;

I was found guilty to share..

The smile on my face was him;

Even in dark the light never seemed dim;

I was a fool and still am.

I was found guilty to trust;

I was found guilty which was a must..

I was scared to get closer;

'cause nothing lasted with me forever!

A bitter sweet loneliness was better;

I was found guilty to befriend him;

I was found guilty to scream..

I stayed awake when I was supposed to be asleep,

These feelings are still strong and deep,

My soul forgot to weep;

I was found guilty to daydream;

I was found guilty to be under moonbeam..

Want him to be happy,

Wished that he never feel lonely,

Cried for him bitterly..

I was found guilty to think we are peers;

I was found guilty to shed tears..

Felt so warm and cozy,

Whenever he hugged me;

I fell in illusion and was giggly,

I was found guilty to be in love..

I was found guilty to consider it love..

"..A cocooned princess.."

She wasn't beautifull,

she wasn't tall,

she wasn't graceful,

but she had a beautiful heart..

Who she was?

She was.. a cocooned princess..

She was a normal girl,

yet she was so special,

she had dreams,

but those were shattered..

She never lived in huge castles,

She never had maids and warriors,

She didn't wear any crown

or lovely robes..

She lived in a virtual world,

with a fake smile on her face,

She never raised voice;

for the injustice done to her,

and that was her crime..

Butterflies never danced;

nor the birds sang,

But the li'l angels giggled,

and the stars twinkled..

whenver she passed by..

Who she was?

She was just a cocooned princess...

She was Naive;

She was shy,

She was betrayed,

she was alone,

She was scared and broken..

She had a friend whom she loved,

But one day they left her,

no, they didn't betrayed

they passed away..

No one to care,

No one in despair,

She wished to fly,

but was scared of falling..

She was free yet she was cocooned..

She was missunderstood,

She was a poor soul,

who lived all alone..

She was a cocooned princess...

"..says a shattered soul.."

My dreams ain't mine now,

My life ain't mine now..

Instead of love and care,

they gave me pain and tears..

They rule my life,

They ruined my life..

so many things to be shared;

but me, me is scared!

Doesn't have any clue;

where my soul shatters..

Darkness is scary;

and silence so weary;

eyes glitters, star twinkles;

and the moon giggles..

"Scared of being alone"

my heart cries.

fake comrades can never know;

my heart is empty and hollow..

Just need someone who care;

someone who have

these same feelings to share..

someone who can understand;

and hold my hand;

so that i would never feel alone again..

"..alone yet not so alone.."

dreams and nightmares,

are all same here..
Tears and smiles,
forever near..
A confused soul,
and an impregnible heart..
Truth and lie,
and a deep sigh..
regrettings no more,
let this love galore..
Don't hide your pains,
let the fireflies guide your way..
the wind whispers,
"leave this despair and lets share,
these feelings inside you ain't just yours..
..Now you are not alone anymore.."

"..from my heart.."

mmmm.. :| okay.. you all might be thinking why I want to delete all my accounts! Actually I scored really low in my exams..which was unexpected.. My parents are angry.. My dad was really angry..he didn't talk to me for 2 days..and then My mom and dad thinks that it's all because of blogging and chatting! >.< But I started chatting just a month before after my exams.. And when I have friends to interact with.. I can't.. well I have just few days..till june 16 but I hope that dad drops his idea! >.<

 So I'm just deleting all my accounts.. coz if he stays firm with his idea... I won't be able to come online for 10 months! yea.. you read it right its 10 MONTHS!!! Ummm.. I'll miss you guys :] I'll miss Mark and Xin yi ( my two vampire friends) I'll miss Alan..though we talk less and just make smileys but still I'll miss him! I'll miss Aditya and Adarsh... haha! well these are my friends on myyearbook :|

Aditya says I'm naive(true), Xin yi thinks I'm funny (I wonder how?), Adarsh says I'm stupid and stubborn (agreed) Alan..mmm.. he never says anything..we both are shy so we never talk(except sometimes) haha! we both stay online for hours and just make smileys and hugs! and Mark...he is so awesome.. I dont know but I cried for him. Adarsh says I can't stay without talking to him!! and I love him!!! (but I dont believe in love and relationships 'cause I've never been in it) But don't you think I am too young to fall in love.. this feelings are annoying me.

Xin yi caught me today..now she knows that the guy with whom may be I'm in love is Mark!! mmm.. that's really weird..why do I care so much about him? Why did I burst into tears when she told me that he would be gone for a week! Xin yi says I overcare about him :? I dont want Mark to know this..He is my bestie!! Don't want to lose such a nice friend :| But what if Xin yi tells this to Mark! :? Mark lives in Croatia and he is 15 !! How can I think about love! :?

Ummmm..well anyways I'll miss him and everyone...If dad stands firm with his idea..then I would tell this to Mark! (But still I dont want to believe that its love..I am just possesive about my friends) They all know that I would delete my accounts except Adarsh! He isn't online these days! :?

PS I won't delete my blog! :]

PPS so Is there anyone who can help me out with this feelings? coz this feelings really sucks! and its not love right? I am too young for this love and even Mark is younger than me!

PPPS Just pray that My dad drops his idea atleat for me and I can't leave without you all! o.o

Tons of awards! :D

haha! I've been awarded with so many awards and here it is :

from jingle :D

Golden heart blogger award :D

Love is precious award :]

Rocking girl blogger award! :D

Best friends forever award :]

most influential blogger award :]

most supportive blogger :]

From cheryl

The circle of freinds award

and Rules:

*Post 5 things you love to do*

*Pass on to 10 Bloggers*

Hmmm.. okay so here I go:

1. I love to eat chocolates! :D

2. I love blogging though I am not blogging these days! >.<

3. I love to sleep! :P

4. I love making smileys..haha i am addicted to it..lol.. I over use this smileys :P

5. I love hanging out with friends..but most important.. I love to chat with Mark and Xin yi(two vampires in my life) ! ^___^

and it goes to:

Koo

Nipun

Rishi

Shravan

Adreamygal

Dudo

Wisewit

Nitwit

Sankoo baba

Madhu

From dudo:

Rules:

*In order to accept the award, please post it on your blog with the name of the person who awarded it, including the link to their blog.*

*Pass the award onto 5-10 of your most loyal followers.*

*Remember to contact those followers and let them know they have been chosen for this award.*

So the award goes to:

Ayu

Vittaldas Prabhu

Suruchi

Divya

Riya

Cheryl

Jingle

Ambiguous angel

Suryagni

That's all sorry about the link! enjoy guys.. haha! I love you xD