3rd accident! :O

3rd accident of this year. Well last year, I used to have at least 1 accident every month so I guess it's not too bad :P !! I'm in pain right now. My knee is still bleeding v_V I haven't told this to Tunesh 'cause I know he'd be mad at me. :O And yet again it wasn't my fault. Actually after Maths tution, me, PPG, Neeraj and Meraj were going back home together. We didn't stop at our "Adda" today. The other guys were still there but we left. Me and Neeraj were ahead and Meraj and PPG were behind us.

I was going really slow since Neeraj was on his bicycle and PPG too 'cause Meraj was on cycle. But suddenly, I don't know what the heck happened but Meraj was in my way and then bam!!! CRASH!! lol :P I fell, and my favorite blue jeans was torn and my knee was bleeding. At that time I couldn't to stand. :O Neeraj helped me to stand up lol XD, and in no time other guys (Prince, Kishan, Pankaj, Manish, Manni and Praveen) rushed to where we were. Meraj was holding me o.o and was supporting me.

It was dark(no street lights).. o.o so since every wanted to see the wound and also wanted to know if I'm okay they used their bike's headlight.:P It was hurting like hell O_O And then Meraj and others kinda argued and were like "we should take her to docs." and some were saying "Geez! yup she needs a doctor!" and I was like "eehh no! I'm okay. Its not too deep." Actually I hate doctors and was scared too. and after that

Meraj said, "Hey let me drop you home"! But I was stubborn and I was saying, "Uh no it's fine. I'm okay and I can go on my own"

Meraj again: "You just sit(pointing at the seat), I'll drop you" But I won. haha. :P I was still in pain!!

We headed to my home. And it kinda looked funny. It was only me and the guys were looking like my body guards. Fun! But then only Prince came with me to my home. We both lied and told that some crazy guy tried to overtake and I fell while trying to save him and the guys beat him for this!! XD Mom medicated it. But its still hurting and bleeding.

P.S. weird o.o Me and Meraj don't really talk. o.O He never took my name! o_O

Can't believe that I wrote this at 2 am!!

Gah! I don't know. I am bored and tired. Hmm, I am happy but not from the bottom of my heart v__V ! Feeling alone again. Just wanna talk to some friends. I just want to go back in past and live those moments again. I wanna change something in the past. I wanna tell them that I love them. :/ I really don't like tough situations in life. Everything ish going smooth but still something doesn't seem right. Arghh.. I don't but yeah I am really scared to smile or laugh. Just want someone to hug tight. My head hurts badly. Blah school ish getting boring =/ Two periods chemistry and two periods Physics really sucks! My tests gonna start from Monday. First one ish chemistry. Blah I have to study Thermodyanamics and Nuclear chemistry. Ohh I'm going to appear IIT exam! o.o Tunesh will get me a form on monday. :3

Umm I wan't to be a fashion designer and a writer too. :) I am letting people to hurt me through their words. :| I'm so dumb! I need a friend who will atleast not make fun of me. Argh why the hell I'm missing Saket??  I hate him! I wanna learn the way of talking. Well I'm different I can't be like others. Umm, all of a sudden, I want to be in relationship. But I'm not pretty. I look so ugly, I'm short and FAT. No one's gonna love me and hell I'll die soon V____V I feel lame now.

"..school.."

I cried today o.o Yeah I know, not a new thing but the reasons are new :/ I cried last night too when I told Mark 'bout me. :/ At school too we were talking 'bout me.  The girls know 'bout it but I haven't told guys. Well Prince and Tunesh knows 'bout it. I guess, Prince ish angry at me.

I don't know how others are going to react 'bout this ovarian tumor/cancer thing. I was so scared in class. And then Saket messed with me!! Lame creature <.< !! I cried 'cause of him and 'cause of that ovarian cancer. But I'm glad that I fooled everyone :P No one knows that I cried. Though they knew that I was in messed up mood. Weird thing ish that Saket made me laugh O_O !!

And later, Sushma, Aastha and Simran started tickling me xD. Me and Srishti annoyed  Riya, Anubha, Sushma and Simran ! :P It was nice and boring o.o ! I told Tunesh 'bout this ovarian tumor today in tution. Ad he kinda didn't believe that. I'm sure he's gonna make fun of me.*sigh*

Saket and Ayush didn't come to tutions today and we found them in our "Adda" :P (Yeah we have our secret den lol) I didn't want to stay so I stayed away but PPG was forcing me to stay. But later Tunesh walked up to where I was standing and said "Tu jaa. mat rook yaha" I left and on my way to home, I received PPG's call saying, "Why did leave? We asked you  to stay then?". I told him that tunesh asked me to do so :) [Tunesh ish always right] so he didn't argue and later when I reached home o.o I recieved Saket's text saying, "I'm just kidding with ya, don't take it seriously"!!

Huh! What the hell does he thinks 'bout me? I'm not Divya, Anisha, Suchita or his GF Pooja!!! I just sent him a blank message! o.o The only thing he'll get by hurting me would be HATRED!!

P.S. please, don't over react ^_^ I'm not going to die now! Be normal ^_^ thanks for caring though!

You don't have to read this!! ^_^

Your best friends betrayed you and you forgave them but still they keep doing the same thing.

you have relatives who don't want you and your family to be happy and they keep doing shits to destroy your family.

You have such uncles and aunts who wants nothing but to kick you out of the school.

You have awesome friends who don't remember your birthday but you still hope that they'll wish you at 12am? But then, you find that its 1 pm and your friends haven't wished you yet and you still care to invite them for your birthday party and like lame creatures they tell you that they can't come.

You have egoistic friends for who their ego, their respect ish more important than your birthday, your tears and your feelings.

You feel alone on your birthday even when you have your friends to celebrate it?

Your bestfriend wished to die before you and God made her wish come true?

You have mean parents who don't let you to go and visit your dying friend just 'cause they think you are a 15 year old naive?

And they are so mean that they won't even let you to go at her funeral and when you are crying and missing her; they yell at you!?

You still miss your dead friend everyday and especially when a friends betrays you and do You write poems to express how much you miss her?

You have a bro who makes you feel like crap.

Your mom ever told you that you are nothing but a burden to them?

Your mom and bro calling you a bitch, a slut and ugly fattie?

Ever felt that your parent's care for you ish nothing but like some sort of slow poision killing you every minute?

Your mom still hits you and beats you with sticks and other stuffs even when you are seventeen?

You have an ex-friend who hates you so much that she wants you to cry and die

You know people across the huge oceans who wants you to be happy and when they look at your sucidal status, they stop you from dying?

Your favorite teacher tried to blame you in a false case of cheating and bluffing and conspiring against the head girl of the school.
Your mom telling you that you are friends are mean but actually they are not atleast not like them. She wont let you to give your notes to anyone and instead she would just expect from the world to help you.

Ever been told by a stupid doctor that you have stomach tumor?

But actually it's not stomach tumor but its ovarian tumor/cancer(a silent killer).

You have a lot of guy friends and you have told everything to your mom about them and their GFs but your mom still don't trust you and calls you a slut then what would you do?

Ever felt that its suffocating at home and ever felt home at school with friends?

Do you feel like dying after having the above craps in your life?

Someone does.. she's trying to be happy and make others happy. She doen't have any hopes and she thinks her life ish really miserable. She writes suicidal notes but she never wants anyone to get worried 'bout that. She has almost decided to kill herself but something hold her back. She ish just too sensitive. The world thinks she's a crazy emo kid but that's not true.

Exhausted!!

I am exhausted. I can't tell you how I am feeling right now! Seems like someone is hammering my head! The doc. gave me more medicines. I puked last night again. Today morning I was feeling better though I was suffering from fever but still...

At school I enjoyed a lot and tried to clear the stuffs between me and safedi ki chamkar. we(my friends and me) came to know about each others secret :P I don't have any secrets cause I have already told every single thing about me :D Though they don't know about my crush :P Then we gave advice to each other. haha good to know that I have just one bad thing actually two..

first is I am never in a good mood :P and the second thing I should stop thinking that my friends don't like me :) They like me, they love me awww... :)

Okay now about the matter between safedi ki chamkar and me.. well she knows that I hate her! :O but she hates me too though she didn't confessed her crime :P She asked me why do I hate her?

My reply to that:

Look I don't have any personal problem with you niether I want to hate you.. just the thing is You have always disliked me and I have heard this from many people even I have realised that. You ignore me!! So its obvious from my side too. :|

So now the perfect gal in the class is Anu and second of course your very own choco lover :D and amongst the guys.. hmmm no one!!!! ;P

sorry I may not read your blog now.. I need some rest so byeee. I can't believe that I just spoiled my 95th post with my blah blah. I'll try to come back with some better stuff next time :)

"I was wondering.."

I hate medicines!! yack!! Doctor aunty has given me lots of medicines. Mom wants me to have those medicines.
*sigh

haha! guess what I have lost 7 kgs in 2 months. yay! yay!yay! I am enjoying the weather, the lonely roads, studies and many blah blah blah things! I am happy and I want to be like that for the whole year.

Questions hopping in my mind :

1.If I hate Safedi ki chamkar then why did I helped her again? why did I share my chocolates with her? :P

2. This one is about angel. Just wondering how cruel and selfish he is! Damn! Till last month he used to talk to me for no reason just because he needed help in completing projects, to pass the exam and many many blah blah things. But now aaaahhh..! he hasn't talked to me. (let me tell you I call that guy angel cause earlier he was in some angel school and everyone calls him angel.... nothing else)

3. Hmm feeling like dumbo after failing the exams! I never failed in any of the test or exam. Always stood second, third or fourth and so on  but never failed. Failed for the first time that too in 2 subjects together. am I dumbo? Will my friends treat me like before? What my teachers would think about me?

4.I am reallly sad about Sunny(my friend). How could komz do that with him? And why the hell stupid boys including Angel, A.V. , Chicky likes her?

5. Has Chimni turned a psycho??

6. Does tragedy queen really likes Chimni? Why she wants to be attentive(specially when the guys are around)??

Now Out burst:

I hate him, him him and him!(they all are different guys) I don't want to listen them, I don't want to look their face, I hate their names, I hate their presence!!